TTBI90D: Days 3-5 and some other happenings :)

The end of Genesis and the Beginning of Exodus!

We are currently up to chapter 15 in Exodus. I must admit that it feels like a milestone, as small as it may be, to have finishing the first book. I am just as committed to this journey as ever, and I am so thankful that two of the most amazing ladies I know are along for the ride. Check out "Lights. . . Camera. . . Ashley" for another great blog.

The end of Genesis revolves pretty much entirely on the story of Joseph. This has always been one of my favorite characters in the Bible. This is a story in which the hand of God is so clearly evident that is is mesmerizing to watch God orchestrate the events of Joseph's life. Joseph was the underdog. Misunderstood, under-appreciated, scorned, mocked, sold, imprisoned, etc. How many of us would have quit after our own brothers sold us into slavery? Or how about after he was imprisoned? So many things happened in Joseph's life that could have given him a reason to quit. However, he let God work out His master plan, and the man that was sold as a slave in Egypt came to rule over it. Such is the power of God. Great and mighty things happen when we let the Lord work. I also love the portrayal of forgiveness we see. When Joseph and his brother's were reunited, they feared he would carry a vendetta against them for all of their evils against them. Instead of payback or vengeance, Joseph forgave and reassured his brothers that they were the means God used to bring Joseph into a position to save the people from the terrible famine. How mysterious and wonderful are the ways of the Lord!

Now that I am getting into Exodus, I have begun reading the story of Moses. Another very familiar story to me, but one that brings to mind a quote I once heard.

"God does not call the equipped;

He equips the called."

Moses did not understand why God has chosen him to lead the Israelites out of bondage, and he made sure that he gave the Lord a full list of reasons He was not good enough. God simply replied that He would give Moses what he needed. After more and more excuses, Moses finally went. How many times does God call me to do something that I refuse or I explain that I am just not equipped to handle that calling?

I am going to Kenya this December! When I first felt the Lord calling me to go I thought, I can't do this! I can't raise that money, I can't communicate with the people, I can't go to Africa! and maybe I can't, but God can. God can bring the money and help me connect with the people of Kenya. I am going, fully expecting God to show up. Pray with me about this trip :)

Well, that is all for now. I am semi-caught up. :)

Five days down. . . eighty-five to go :)

TTBI90D: Day 2!

Day 2: Genesis 17:1-Genesis 28:19

Chapters 17 and 18 remind me that we serve a God who's ways are not our own. His master plan is something we don't always readily see, and even when he reveals it, we may not understand it. This is where faith comes in. We must have enough faith to follow God's instructions, trusting he is working it all out for the good. Abraham does just that. When his wife Sara heard that God had supposedly promised she would bare a son in her old age, she laughed at the thought. I love what the Gen 18:14 says,

"Is anything too hard for the Lord?"

What a slap in the face! One i think we all need, including myself. How many times do I get wrapped up in a situation or struggle that I feel there is no way it will work out. It just can't be done. Is anything too hard for the Lord? NO! So why must we always fret. Why do we still search as if He's not enough?

CH 18: This is a unique exchange between Abraham and God, one I find quite amusing. Abraham barters with God, trying to lower the price of God's mercy. After seeing nothing but wickedness in Sodom and Gomorrah, God was going to destroy it. However, Abraham made a deal that if he found ten righteous men, God would spare the city. The interesting thing is that if Abraham had just reached his own family, the city would be spared. Abraham, Sara, his son and the woman who bore him, his nephew Lot and his wife and children, as well as their extended family (such a sons-in-law). It was not as if Abraham had to find complete strangers. If only his family had been righteous before God, the city could have been spared. Interesting thought I think.

CH 19: This is the big scene in which Lot's wife looks back and turns into a pillar of salt. Just a glance back at where she came from cost her everything God had set before her. Isn't that just like us? God gives us salvation, second chances, yet we still have a hard time letting go of the things he has told us to leave in the past.

CH 22: I have always been amazed by the story of Abraham being willing to sacrifice Isaac. What a beautiful foreshadowing of the sacrifice that God would give by allowing his only son to die. Oh, what I would do to have the kind of faith that took. A song says, " I wonder how it must have felt. Abraham with knife in hand was poised to kill. But God in all his sovereignty had bigger plans, and just in time, he brought a ram. You were there, you were there in the midst of the unclear. You were there, you were there always. You were there when obedience seemed so out of reach, oh you were there. You were always there."

CH 28: God is speaking in verse 15, and I am so encouraged by His words,

"Behold, I am with you and will keep you wherever you go, and will bring you back to this land; for I will not leave you until I have done what I have spoken to you."

You see, God has a plan, a great plan for each and every one of us. If we let him run the show, instead of trying to accomplish it by our own means, we are promised that He will be with us and finish the work he starts in us.

Loving this challenge, you should join us. Day 2 is in the books, and God is already blessing me tremendously!

Through the Bible in 90 Days Challenge: Day 1!

I am very excited to begin a new journey to read the Bible in 90 days. It is a commitment I am making over the course of the summer to commit to reading God’s word. My prayers is that I learn what I have never learned before and that who God is becomes that much more real to me. I want to learn as much as I can. As a result of my journey, I will be blogging about what I get from the reading each day. I would encourage anyone to join in with me. If you’d like to let me know! I ideally would like to blog everyday, but when that isn’t possible, I will still be reading and will catch up the blog as I can.

Day 1: Genesis 1:1-Genesis 16:16

CH 1: As I read the account of creation, I can’t help but marvel at our amazing creator. The intricacy of his design is enough to point men to a savior. I love that when he talked about creating the animals and other things he said to create an “abundance”. You can see Him as a master creator with a vision for His creation. When he begins to talk about creating man and making him in His image, I can almost hear the excitement and love in His voice. Charles Stanley’s study Bible points out a life principle during this passage,

“Our intimacy with God – His highest priority for our lives – determines the impact of our lives.”

How true this is! His desire for intimacy with his most prized creation is clearly seen in this account of creation found in Genesis. It is essential that we deepen that intimacy more and more. Our impact in this lifetime for the kingdom is directly correlated to the level of intimacy we have with God.

CH 2: How awesome is our creator that he knows our ever need and deepest desire. He saw Adam’s need for his missing piece. The relationship God forms in this chapter between man and woman is a beautiful thing. The account of God taking Adam’s rib reminds me of a quote the pastor said during my best friend’s wedding ceremony, “God did not choose a piece of Adam’s head, so that woman would be over him; nor did He select a piece from Adam’s foot, so that he would step on her. Rather, our loving Creator chose man’s rib, so that woman was taken from his side–to be his equal…from under his arm–to be protected by him…and from near his heart–to be loved by him.”

CH 3: One thing that caught my eye in this chapter is that the end is the first time we see “woman” given a name when Adam names her eve. This deception by Satan shows his very nature. He looks for our weakest moments (Eve was alone) and uses our deep desires (Adam and Eve sought knowledge and perfection) and uses them to draw us into sin. I see Eve’s reaction when God finds out about her sin to be much like many of our own’s. She automatically blamed someone else. Isn’t is so easy to say “The Devil made me do it.” rather than dealing with the issues at hand and our own failures before God.

CH 4: I have heard the story of Cain murdering Abel my whole life, growing up in Sunday school. It is so easy to say how awful and unfathomable his actions are, but when I stop to think, I am reminded that without daily walking with God and resting in his grace, I could quickly find myself doing things I never thought I would do. My sins are no worse in the eye’s of God than Cain’s were.

CH 5: I used to think geneologies of who begat who were beyond boring; but when I take time to look at it and really pay attention, there are many things to learn from it. Here we see the family lineage of Adam, which includes Noah himself, future boat enthusiast

CH 6: My favorite quote in this chapter, “Noah walked with God.” If God were to have written about us in his word, could that quote apply to our lives? Would our name be able to be placed where Noah’s is and the word of God remain truth? Now that is something to strive for!

CH 7: Fact, it wasn’t two of every animal that went into the ark. 7 of every clean animal, and 2 of every unclean animal. However, they did enter two by two How excruciating must it have been for a Creator to destroy is beloved creation. How gut-wrenching must it have been for God to look down and only see “wickedness continually” What do you think God is thinking as he looks down at us now, during our generation?

CH 8: I love this beautiful picture of God taking care of those who serve Him. In the midst of a world in chaos, God hand delivered his faithful people. How encouraging!

CH 11: In these geneologies, I learned that Abraham and Lot were descendants from the lineage of Shem, Noah son.

CH 13: What I find interesting about Lot’s decision of which way he wants to take his herd is that it was based solely on aritficial appeal. He did not seek counsel, but rather made a decision on the plains of Jordan because they looked good. Looks can be deceiving though, as we will later see that Sodom and Gommorah, home of so much wickedness and evil, was a part of the land Lot chose.

CH 15: I love what God says to Abram at the beginning of this chapter, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.” Those words are wonderful to me, and much needed at this moment!

CH 16: Sarai’s actions in this chapter show a tendency I feel many of us struggle with from time to time. She got to impatient to wait for God to complete His work in her, unfolding his perfect plan in His own time. Rather, she decided to take matters into her own hands, not trusting God to take care of things for her. Many problems start from this choice. I do it so often, I forget that there is a sovereign savior in control of every aspect of my life. There is not need to worry about tomorrow or try to work it out myself, God is already there and has everything set just the way he intends it to go if I will just follow Him and trust.

Wow, day 1 of this challenge was incredibly. I have a heavy heart about a situation, and there is nothing more encouraging than digging into God’s word and reading stories of provision and promise of God to those who trust in him. What a blessing.

Slow Down to Speed Up

Wow. . . its been a while since I posted. Life is so beyond nonstop and I find it hard to get a spare minute for anything these days. Its funny how quickly life moves, it seems like just yesterday I began dating my boyfriend and next week will make half a year. The best half a year I could ever wish for.

I get to these times in life where I am so flipping excited about the future and all of the things I truly believe my future holds that I can hardly wait for it to get here. At the same time though, I am so in love with my life and I love this season of life too. Its this strange back and forth. Time passes so quickly, more quickly than we realize or really even wish it too. We turn around and wonder where the time has gone. How did I let it get this long since I've called that friend or visited that family member. When was the last time I just stopped? let the hussle and bussle of life just fall away?

We get so wrapped up in life that i passes us by. I want so much to live this part of my life to its fullest because I am a truly blessed person. At the same time, when I look at me future, the people and the things that make my future, I am so incredibly happy and blessed and some days I wish I could fast forward.

I guess what I am saying is no matter how bad some days or weeks are, I have a wonderful life full of wonderful people and I am blessed and happy.

Eye Opening. . . . .

If you start reading this, please finish it. . . 

So, here's the thing. In light of recent conversations I have realized that as much as I was aware of the way people perceive weight and the way that affects relationships and getting noticed by the opposite sex, I really had no clue the severity of it. 

I guess it's because to me it doesn't matter. They way a person treats me and the heart they have are what matters. You can say I'm a liar if you want. You can say that it's not possible to really not care about looks but I know the truth. and it doesn't matter!

To hear the way guys think explained by a guy was shocking to me. It like how in the world is a woman supposed to be comfortable with who she is when she constantly has to worry about that. I am the girl who has struggled with it. I'm the girl who changes outfits about four times every day before she leaves because I think I look terrible. I'm the girl who always has her arms crossed trying to hide. On some days, Im the girl who overanalyzes everything she puts in her mouth because I am terrified of gaining weight. Literally, not a day goes by that I don't worry about it. I try to be rational and say it doesn't matter, but from the things I've heard in the past few days, it so obviously does matter. 

It makes me so angry because there are girls who have it even worse. Girls who hurt themselves because of it. I fought against those things and thankfully am able to keep myself from doing that. But the constant insecurities have the power to wear anybody down. 

I did not write this blog so I get 500 text message and 20 phone calls of friends yelling at me and telling me I'm fine the way I am . In fact, if you read this please don't talk to me about it. These are personal thoughts I am venting out. 

However, I am writing this as a challenge. If you tell yourself that it's only natural to judge others on their outward appearance, if you use the copout that you are a guy and your mind just works that way, give it up. Choose to be better than that. I don't believe that people have to be that way. I don't believe that all the hurting and insecure girls out there have to feel these things so determine to be different. Be the change. 

I am tired of the media and society telling girls that if they aren't a certain size or weight they aren't beautiful or they aren't normal or they don't deserve and won't get a boyfriend. That is pathetic and I don't buy it. 

I don't care if you are a size 2 or a size 20, you're beautiful as far as I'm concerned. . . . .

I am so frustrated about this topic so if anyone has insights i'd love to chat about it, just not anything about me personal that I may have shared in this blog post. 

Your Everything :)

I found this beautiful song the other day and thought I'd share. 

Enjoy. . . . 

The first time I looked in your eyes I knew That I would do anything for you The first time you touched my face I felt What I'd never felt with anyone else.  I wanna give back what you've given to me And I wanna witness all of your dreams Now that you've shown me who I really am I wanna be more than just your man.  I wanna be the wind that fills your sails Be the hand that lifts your veil Be the moon that moves your tides The sun comin' up in your eyes Be the wheel that never rusts Be the spark that lights you up All that you've been dreamin' of and more So much more I wanna be your everything.  When you wake up I'll be the first thing you see and when it gets dark you can reach out to me I'll cherish your words and I'll finish your thoughts I'll be your compass baby, when you get lost.  I wanna be the wind that fills your sails Be the hand that lifts your veil Be the moon that moves your tides The sun comin' up in your eyes Be the wheel that never rusts Be the spark that lights you up All that you've been dreamin' of and more So much more I wanna be your everything.  --- Instrumental ---  Be the wheel that never rusts Be the spark that lights you up All that you've been dreamin' of and more So much more I wanna be your everything.  I wanna be your everything.  I wanna be your everything...

Always Coming Up Short. . . way short.

There is something funny about life. The way we try so hard to be everything for everybody. The way we try to be the best at everything we try to do. The sad thing is that isn't possible. We'll always come up short. We will fail, many times most likely. 

I was sadly reminded today what it feels like to not be good enough. Its not enough anymore to do something because you love it or because its fun. If you aren't the best at it then whats the point. At least thats most people's view. I get so frustrated with all the pressure to succeed and to meet people's expectations. I'll never be perfect. I don't want to be perfect. I just want to be surrounded be people who love me for me, imperfections and all. Because imperfections make us who we are. Our failures are what teaches us how to succeed in the future. 

I want to be able to do things for me, like sing at the top of my lungs and not care who hears, but I don't think thats possible. The experiences of our past and the people that have told us we aren't good enough will always be in our memory telling us we can't.  

I guess thats just life.